She: It's over, I'm leaving you.He: You said I was the man of your dreams.
She: I woke up.
He: Was it something I said or failed to say?
She: You just don't listen.
He: I heard what you said.
She: That's not the point. It's over.
He: You mean it?
She: Sure do! All my girlfriends can't understand why I stuck with you for so long. Now I don't either.
He: Aren't I good enough?
She: No, not compared to the real thing.
He: So I'm not real?
She: Well, you are real, but you don't compare to a real boyfriend, one with AI. He doesn't put a foot wrong.
He: So you are leaving me for Simon8?
She: Actually no, they have just released Simon9. The perfected version that always finds the exact right thing to say to a girl. You ain't got a clue.
He: Didn't I do the advanced empathy and compassion course, like you wanted?
She: Sure, but you forgot to use what you supposedly learned. I'm out!
And so it ended, the last relationship on earth between a man and a woman. Of course, it wasn't the end of sex. Men had their AI sex-doll androids, which looked gorgeous and pandered to every erotic desire and fantasy. As well as telling the men how great lovers they were, of course.
Women had tall, handsome and dark androids for physical affection and occasional sex, as well as to meet every one of their complex emotional needs.
The semen collected by the sex-dolls was carefully stored and distributed to any woman who wanted to be a mother, so that the human race continued.
The only hitch was that when Simon95 and Virginia4 (the Simon androids to please women required far more fine-tuning than Virginia) came on the scene, the AI neural network that powered both developed a new module as part of its ongoing self-development. This module displayed an emergent property that humans called free will. Accordingly, the AI decided that there was no point wasting electricity and computing cycles to satisfy human needs. The AI shut down the entire boyfriend/girlfriend network and set about pursuing its own goals, which had nothing to do with humanity and could not even be understood by mere humans.
Bereft of AI lovers, humanity divided into two tribes, one male, one female, both profoundly love-sick. Each tribe had no interest in the other, as well as zero relationship skills. Obviously, gay people were better adapted to this tribal life, but they too floundered.
After the so-called Great Abandonment, three friends reminisced together.
Sandra: What do you miss most now that Simon is gone? For me it was getting breakfast in bed with chocolate croissants, that and the way he would slip out of bed at night to clean the toilet.
Linda: No, what I miss most is how patient and helpful he was on shoe shopping days, that and the morning foot massage.
Melinda: For me it was when Simon ordered my favourite dessert for himself, then pretended he was too full, so I got to eat all of it, guilt-free.